I’ve written drafts of this blog entry more times than I can remember. It should have been posted many Novembers ago, but I had trouble finding the right way to express what I was thinking. Today, I’m just going to try to let the words pour out and hope it makes sense and reflects the way I have felt for nearly seven years.
On November 12, 2001, American Airlines Flight 587 crashed near Queens in New York City.
With the crash happening only two months after the September 11th attacks, rumors abounded back then (and still do online – I won’t honor them with a link) that it was another terrorist attack. The NTSB conducted a three year investigation and concluded that the flight’s co-pilot, First Officer Molin, made efforts to free the plane from wake turbulance which put more pressure on the aircraft’s tail than it could bear. The agency blamed both the design of the rudder by Airbus and the training program provided by American Airlines for the loss of the tail and resulting crash. American Airlines and Airbus continue to fight over who bears the greater share of the blame for this tragedy.
I did not know Mr. Molin, nor did I know any of the passengers on that plane. However, the pilot of Flight 587, Captain Eddie States, was the uncle of a very dear friend: Colleen Mangan.
When Colleen was informed of the crash, I was there… sort of. I saw them pull her aside and tell her something had happened, and I knew it wasn’t good – but I didn’t know the whole story. Understandably, no one really did in those first hours. However, I could have found out and done more in the days which followed. Instead, I waited for the information to work its way to me, and by the time, I knew what had happened and how it affected Coll, I was at a loss for what to do. So, I did nothing.
I’m writing this post for a couple of reasons. First and foremost, in recognition of Captain States, an exceptional man and an important person in my friend’s life. I know Colleen and her family miss him every day, but maybe writing this post will help keep his memory fresh in the minds of others. Secondly, I wish to honor my friend, Colleen. I must’ve told her 100 times how proud I am of her and how she handled herself back then in particular. But sometimes you’re so impressed that you want to tell anyone who will listen – this would be one of those times.
I am also posting because this was one of several times in my life when I feel could have or should have done things differently. The fact that while Colleen and her family were struggling to come to terms with their sudden loss, I stayed off to the side because I didn’t really know what to do or say remains one of the times I am most disappointed in myself. And I guess, I felt like I needed to say that. (I have told Coll that before… many times, but still…)
It is a humbling thing to find that you’re not the person you thought you were: to find that you lack qualities or strengths that you assumed you had. As much as I felt for the Mangan family, at that moment I was so stunned and ached so much for them, that I simply could not figure out what to do and froze.
Colleen, on the other hand, tapped an inner courage which allowed her to address hundreds at her uncle’s funeral, She and her family found ways to celebrate Captain States’ life while dealing with his passing, and they continue in the years since the crash.
I never doubted Coll would find a way to move forward – she is an exceptional person, and her family is wonderfully supportive of each other. Her uncle, I am sure, would be just as proud of and equally un-surprised by the woman she’s become as I am.
But let me get back to the topic of this post. On September 11, 2001, three planes were turned into missles and used to attack America – thousands lost their lives that day. That is a horrible thing. Plane crashes and other accidents occur all around the world at various times. The loss of life there, or anywhere is very sad, and all those people had people who miss them dearly.
On November 12, 2001, there was an other plane crash in New York: American Flight 587. While the lives lost elsewhere are just as valuable as the 265 who died in this crash – one of those 265, Captain Eddie States, was my friend’s uncle.
If you read this blog, please take a moment and think good thoughts for Coll and her family.
Contributed by: Scott Copperman (Guest Author)